Last night I promised my girl I'd try to be a better mommy. We were both in tears, it was tough. Yesterday morning we were running late, I was tired (as usual) and I yelled at my girl. She loves to put the car key in the ignition and because we were running late, I yelled at her and said no. She stood her ground, refused and did it anyway. I yelled some more. Put her in her seat and yelled just a little bit more. She cried. And I instantly felt terrible.
This isn't the first time this has happened. I am not a naturally patient person. Just ask the hubs. I pray for patience for my daughter. It's so tough. I like schedules and organization and while my kid has a bit of OCD, she is 3. And fiercly independent.
She told me last night that I made her heart hurt when I yelled at her. And that when I yell, she doesn't like me. I left her room crying. That is just about the meanest thing a mommy can hear - and the most honest.
It will continue to be a struggle for me. But, I love my girl, so I'm up for the challenge.
But, flash back to two weekends ago (yes, I'm just now getting to blogging about it) and E was able to create some super cute (and fun) memories with her daddy. Filthy car + super hot weather = bathing suit splash party
I know that as a whole, we are providing our girl with wonderful childhood memories and a home filled with love. But, my conversation was an important reminder to pray for patience and focus on creating special childhood moments - and to remind her each day that she is smart, she is kind and she is beautiful.
Being a mommy is tough sometimes and the worst thing I've been told is "mommy you broke my heart." I hope and pray that it isn't a significant memory and it will be forgotten but I'm always a work in progress and I too make mistakes. I think it's okay for our little ones to understand that we make mistakes too and that we can say I'm sorry. Tomorrow is always a new day and I pray tomorrow that I will do better. You sound like an amazing mommy so just keep doing what you do and all will be okay, xoxo
ReplyDeleteBeth, you are so sweet! Thank you for your kind words. Every day of parenthood is a struggle, I think. But, I try a little harder every day and that is the best I can do. She truly is the most amazing little girl... I can look at the pictures above and know that, so tomorrow is another day and I'll keep trying to get it right.
ReplyDeletexo